The Tale of thePeasantthat had Lunch with the Landlord
A Ukrainian folk tale
A long time ago there lived a landlord in the countryside. He was rich and arrogant. He did not want to know anyone who was lesser than him. Thus he treated peasants as mud, because of their poverty, because of their unpleasant odour. He did not like the smells of earth and manure! And he usually ordered his lackeys to drive such men away from his yard.
Once the peasants got together on the outskirts of the village and began to talk about their landlord. One man said:
"The other day I looked over the fence and saw the landowner, sitting with his wife on the balcony and drinking coffee."
"This is nothing new. Yesterday I saw our landlord in the field - I met him face to face!" - replied another man.
At this point, a poor farm worker came up to them, listened to them and began to laugh:
"What's the big deal! If I want, I may not only take a look over the fence, but I can have dinner with that gentleman!"
"I'll bet you won't do it! You can't dine with the landlord! As soon as he sees you, he will order his servants to kick you out and not to allow you within shooting range! - answered the peasants. They began to argue.
"I bet I can! - shouted the poor man. "No deal, you are lying!" - they replied. "I'm not lying!" - he said.
"Well, if you have dinner with the landlord, you will get three sacks of wheat and two of our best oxen. But if you don't have dinner, then you will do everything that we say."
"I agree!" - replied the man.
Here the poor man went to the manor house. But when the lackeys saw him, they rushed to the gates, going definitely to get rid of him.
"Wait a minute," - the man stopped them, "I have good news for the master!"
"What is this news?" - they asked.
"I won't tell anyone, I'll just tell the landlord!"
The servants went to the landlord and reported, "Here is what happened."
The landlord was thrilled and thought:
"The peasant has come not with a request, but with some news! Maybe I will get something in the end." And he ordered the lackeys:
"Let him in."
The lackeys allowed the poor man to enter the courtyard. The master came to him and asked:
"What is your news?"
The farm worker looked at the lackeys and said:
"Sir, I would speak with you face to face."
The landlord was curious,
"What is the case?"
He ordered the servants to leave. When they were left alone, the man said quietly:
"Sir, tell me please, how much would cost a bar of gold, the size of a horse's head?"
"Why do you ask?" - said the landlord.
"I gotta know it!" - replied the man.
"Aha," - thought the master, - "it was not without reason, his question! Evidently, he found some treasure..."
The landlord's mouth watered for the treasure, his hands were shaking. He kept on asking:
"Tell me, good man, why do you need to know?"
The farm worker sighed and said: "Well, if you can't name the figure, do as you please. But I have no time - I should go to dinner!"
The landlord forgot his pride and stood shivering with greed. He thought:
"I should trick the bastard - I must hustle the gold!" And he then said:
"Look, good man, why do you rush home? If you are hungry, eat lunch with me!"
He ordered his servants:
"Hey you there, lay the table quickly and serve the dinner for two; bring us gorilka (i.e. vodka) for a start!" The lackeys vividly brought gorilka, set the table and put the best meals. The landlord invited the guest into the house and began to regale him:
"Drink, good man! Eat my bread and salt, don't be shy!"
And the master treated and served the poor man. The landlord fed the man to satiety and said:
"Well, now go home quickly and bring me a bar of gold, the size of a horse's head! I can better manage with it than you. And you will get the reward - I'll give you ten roubles!"
"No, sir, I can't bring the gold!" - replied the poor man.
"But why, old chap?" "Because I don't have it."
"How is it - no? Why had you asked, how much it cost?
"It's my wish, just to be on the safe side - out of curiosity."
The landlord got angry, turned red, stamped his feet and shouted:
"Get out, you fool!" The peasant said in response:
"No, my gracious lord! It's not true that I'm a brainless fool as you think. I have been making fun of you! I won three sacks of wheat and two mighty oxen. It's too much of a fool!"
The man thanked the landlord for the delicious lunch and went for his oxen...
![The Tale of the Peasant that had Lunch with the Landlord [Славянский Владимир Владимирович]](/img/s/slawjanskij_wladimir_wladimirowich/thetaleofthepeasantthathadlunchwiththelandlord/thetaleofthepeasantthathadlunchwiththelandlord-1.jpg)